Commitment

By Lloyd Luna

Dear Mr. Lloyd Luna,

Just to say thank you and more power to you and your column. I always look forward to read those letters and advice of yours which is truly touching and inspirational. Today, while I'm reading your explanation on the difference between “what you can achieve” and “what you want to achieve” it certainly hits me and my so called “believe in yourself” attitude have been revived... Thank you so much!

Sally Libiran
Singapore

Dear Sally,

I'm happy to know that you've been very supportive to my writings. It's a pleasure for me to reach such an enthusiastic audience as you and I'd like to give you a personal follow of your so-called “believe in yourself.” This is the same title of the book I made for Reyes Haircutters.

Believing in one's self is very important if you want to accomplish something. For one, belief makes us pursue anything and two it drives us to just go there despite the odds waiting for us. It is therefore so true that believing in yourself-in what you can become, you can do, and you can dream of-has something to do with your life design. If there's one thing that God has given us, it is our ability to design our own life-no limits.

Now, your belief has its twin sister. Every time they go together, they form a reality. And, the good news is that together, they're in their strongest. After believing that one thing can be done and it can be achieved, you have to commit in it. You must not stop until it is done, until you're there, and until you have your harvest.

On January 20, I was privileged to be invited to the wedding of my good friend actress Maybelyn dela Cruz. Finally, Michael Fernandez took her to the altar of the Minor Basilica of the Immaculate Concepcion. My friend Pocholo Gonzales was with me and we had a great time. Just before Maybelyn walked at the aisle, she was calling our names thanking us for coming. I hope there are words to describe how she's feeling at that time. There's one thing that I'm sure of though-it's more than a happy feeling. It's a joy.

I'm not yet married. I don't know the feeling of being committed to sometime for life. But just like what I've heard over and over again every time I get to be in a wedding, they would tell me about commitment. Very simply, most of the married life should have it otherwise there'll be no marriage at all.

To my mind, this is pretty much the same as our career life. Many times I was asked how I was able to keep a total control of my career life as an author and as a Filipino motivational business speaker. I always say that I'm committed at it.

I haven't seen exactly how the relationship went for Maybelyn and Michael during the early years. I first saw them together during the showing of an Indi movie “7 Tagpo” at the SM Mall of Asia. But I think commitment has tied them together, Maybelyn being a full-time partner rather than a full-time showbiz personality.

Commitment is this: When you willfully submit yourself to someone or something that makes you ready to leave some of your personal desire for a greater reason and a common good. When you learn that someone or something else is more important than your ambition, you give up some of them so you can give in to a happy and fulfilled life with your chosen someone or something. When learn to let go of everything you fear to lose just to make it to the finish line.

But to Maybelyn and Michael, I believe the altar is not a sort of a finish line or a final destination and wedding rings not a trophy for having achieved something. I believe it's a beginning of a new race, a new adventure, a new opportunity for them to show more love, more compassion, more care, more understanding toward each other. And of course more babies! Nobody said that living a married life is easy. But even if it's not easy, every partner can choose to make it work or not. And as for my personal wish for this new couple, choose to make it work.

Pocholo told me during the reception at the Coconut Palace that he's sure the first baby will have a name beginning with an “M.” I don't know but when that happens, I think M would mean “more mature married life.” After all, that's the only way for them to go.

Value your dreams,

BIG