Why Are There People Who Are Annoying?

Chinkee Tan
Chinkee Tan

Are there people in your life whom you find annoying?

Do you not know anymore how you will deal with them?

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Are you running out of patience for them?

We are all created unique. No two persons are 100% the same in any aspect in their life. They may have the same last name, but they don’t have the same culture or upbringing. They may have the same birthday, but they don’t have the same outlook in life. It is our differences with people that cause us to be annoyed with them.

Humans are inherently selfish, and this is why whatever it is that we want, that’s what we want to happen as much as possible. Whether or not you admit, that’s the reality.

But it’s not wrong to be annoyed. That’s a normal reaction. After all, we are only humans. The difference lies in how we respond during those instances that we become annoyed with other people.

Everyone is entitled to react or to respond to situations according to how they feel.

The question is, what is your response – negative or positive?

Actually, it’s your CHOICE. That’s your decision. If you want to dwell on the thousand reasons why this person is annoying, then do it. But let me share my insights on how you can respond in a positive way.


You have to accept the fact that people are all unique.

Accept the fact that your spouse is not as organised as you are. Accept the fact that your son is a hoarder of things, and he’s not like you who wants to keep things at a minimum. Accept the fact that your sister has an extravagant lifestyle, unlike you who wants to live only within or even below your means. Accept the fact that the kind of bonding that your niece wants is to spend time with you while using their iPad, unlike you who wants pure face to face interaction. Accept the fact that people are different from you.

If you don’t accept that people are different and unique, you will only be frustrated, and you will find everyone around you annoying. You will only be affected in a negative way. The single most frustrating thing to do is to try to change others and make them like you. Why? Because it is impossible.


We also have the tendency to think that if you can do it, others can do it too. Have you ever asked someone to do something, and then it took that person two years before he or she was able to complete the task? But if you would be the one to do it, it would only take you two days.

It’s with things like these that we are annoyed and frustrated.  

But we have to accept that people have their own limitations. You can only do so much on your part. But once you have done your part, choose to accept the fact that they have a choice to make too – the decision is theirs whether or not they will do something about their limitations or not.  

Remember that you have no control over almost everything in life. You don’t have control over the weather, the time, and even over other people. But you do have control over yourself. And that’s exactly where you need to focus on – focus on controlling the things you can actually control.


Another factor why we always get annoyed is because we want to control all of our life and our future. Admit it or not, you and I cannot control our future. As much as we plan to and as much as we do the best that we can, we can really only do so much.

This is where FAITH comes in. Your relationship with God is what enables you to trust that GOD IS IN CONTROL, not us. HE HOLDS OUR FUTURE, not us. HE KNOWS BETTER than we do. And this is why if we do not surrender our lives and our future to God, it is us who are on the losing end.  

If you are always annoyed, believe me, that is coming from something deeper. You cannot continue to live in such a way that being annoyed is part of your lifestyle. That’s very stressful!


What about you, what do you find most annoying in life?

Are you annoyed at one particular person? Or maybe you are annoyed at yourself?

What can you do to lessen this?

(Chinkee Tan is a top Filipino motivational speaker, wealth and life coach whose goal is to inform, educate, motivate, and disturb. His vision is to help people become financially-literate and debt-free. For more info about Chinkee Tan, please visit his fan page at FB, Twitter and Instagram. Also follow VIBER PUBLIC CHAT GROUP search chinkee tan, and VISIONCHINKEE on You Tube for more news and encouragements.)

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