How Have You Ever Felt Unloved?

Chinkee Tan
Chinkee Tan

Have you ever felt or experienced these things…

“I’m a legitimate child, but why are they treating me as if I were adopted?”

“I’m married, but I’m taken for granted. He only notices me whenever he needs something.”

“He spends more time with his friends than with us, his family.”

“My son treats me as if I’m not his mother.”

Do you sometimes feel like no one loves you?

No one loves you in the sense that you can’t feel the respect from others? You can’t feel that the people around you value you?

The worst part is that when you feel these things again and again, all the insecurity, negative thoughts, and desire to just give up will kick in.

But it doesn’t have to end up like that. You, yourself can do something to relieve yourself of the pain that you are feeling, and make yourself feel loved. Because after all the way that you feel is something that you can decide on your own.

What are the things that one must remember in the midst of feeling unloved, insecure, or unimportant?


If you can’t understand why this certain person treats you the way that he/she does, talk to him/her. Talk to the person who has offended you. He/she might have a problem during those moments that he/she didn’t treat you kindly. Or this person might have no idea at all that his/her words and actions are already hurting other people.

Let the person know of your sentiments. With proper communication and awareness of the issue, there’s a possibility that you can both be sensitive to each other’s feelings.


There may be certain things in a person that we can no longer change. Usually, these are the habits that a person has gotten used to over the years.

Let go and let God change the course. Pray for that person, and allow Him to take control of the things that we have no control of. Ask God to guide you on what you need to do, to be able to take part in carrying out His plan – take note, His plan, not yours.


You don’t have to keep what you are feeling all to yourself. That’s why you have friends. If one person made you feel unloved, it doesn’t mean that every single person around you doesn’t love you.

Take advantage of the gift of friendship. Your friends are the ones who will boost your morale with their kind and sincere words. You will then realize that you are not alone, and that you have people who you can trust and lean on, no matter what.


During those moments that you feel like you are not worth anything, don’t add insult to the injury by thinking and speaking negatively about yourself. If you do this, you will only feel more down and depressed.

Instead of saying that no one loves you or cares about you, say:

“I am worthy.”

“I am loved.”

“I am important.”

Because you are all these. Make it a habit to say positive things about your own self. Remember, positive thoughts create positive results.

And finally, remind yourself that …


God, who is Love, was the one who created you. Nothing or no one in this world can ever match or surpass the love that God has for you. Even when we were still sinners, He already loved us.

Keeping this in mind at all times can calm you and help you think that although you feel like you are not being given much importance, there is a God who values you. You just need to allow Him to enter into your life.

I hope in this season of the hearts. You just gotta open your heart in order for you to experience a change of heart.


Are there people in your life who hurt you in the past?

Have you taken steps to fix this?

Have you come to terms with yourself that you don’t need their approval to feel complete?

(Chinkee Tan is a top Filipino motivational speaker, wealth and life coach whose goal is to inform, educate, motivate, and disturb. His vision is to help people become financially-literate and debt-free. For more info about Chinkee Tan, please visit his fan page at FB, Twitter and Instagram. Also follow VIBER PUBLIC CHAT GROUP search chinkee tan, and VISIONCHINKEE on You Tube for more news and encouragements.)

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The Good News Pilipinas Team
The Good News Pilipinas Team is a group of Filipino journalists who advocate putting more good news stories about the Philippines and Filipinos on the media.