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How To Overcome Self-Pity

Cypher Learning
Cypher Learning
Chinkee Tan
Chinkee Tan

Are you the type of person who likes to go on a SELF-PITY party? You will go in one corner, cry, and say to yourself, “Woe to me! What about me? What will become of me?” 

You don’t want to talk to other people because you feel like other people will not understand what you are going through.  

Your eyes are swollen from all the crying, and you feel like your head is about to explode, and your vocal chords are already giving up on you from all your howling and wailing. And yet, you are still not done with your pity party.  

You even invited your negatron friends over for sumptuous catered meals. And it doesn’t seem like you intend for your pity party to be just a one-time event, but as a lifetime event!  

But if you are already tired and fed up of all this pity party because in the first place, you are the only one present in it, allow me to first discuss with you the reasons behind self-pity.  

One of the factors why you find yourself having a pity party from time to time is…  


You are too busy waiting for that something that will draw you attention.  

You want to always KEEP ON RECEIVING. And this is why when the moment comes when you are not able to receive anything, you feel like it’s the end of the world, and that you are in such a wretched state. And you always want to hold on to what you are feeling.  

Another reason could be that you have…  


You don’t FEEL good about yourself, and you feel like someone else is always BETTER and GREATER than you.  

What fills your mind are thoughts like these: 

“I can’t do it.” 

“I’m not good enough.” 

“I don’t have any talent.”  

“No one really loves me.” 

And probably, it’s also because of… 


You’ve never been happy with WHAT YOU HAVE. You always feel like nothing is ever ENOUGH. You always want MORE.  

You were already given a salary increase, and yet you still chose to say, “That’s it? That was such a meagre increase! You might as well have not increased my salary. I have so many bills to pay for!” 

Pity-parties are draining! This is why I want to share with you some tips on how you can overcome self-pity. What you can do is… 


Enough already with waiting for whatever will come your way. It’s time to REDIRECT YOUR FOCUS from yourself to others.  

Try to OBSERVE THE NEEDS OF OTHERS. Assess how you will be able to offer them help, and start extending a helping hand. This will definitely give you a different kind of happiness – a kind that you have never and will never experience in a pity party.  


We are all created UNIQUE by the Lord. We are just like the parts of the body. God didn’t create our bodies to be all eyes. This is because aside from that not being a pretty sight to look at, we are created not only to see things. There are other functions that we need to be able to perform.  

So all you have to do is focus on your strengths and MAXIMIZE them.  

And lastly, don’t forget to… 


When you focus on the lack, you will never really be contented.  

But if you think about all the good things that have happened to you, you will realize that truly, you have a lot to be thankful for.  


Did you recently have a pity party? 

Do you want to put an end to your pity party? 

If yes, how will you be able to put an end to your pity party?

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Chinkee Tan
Chinkee Tanhttps://chinkeetan.com/
Chinkee Tan is a top Filipino motivational speaker, wealth and life coach whose goal is to inform, educate, motivate, and disturb. His vision is to help people become financially-literate and debt-free. For more info about Chinkee Tan, please visit his fan page at FB, Twitter and Instagram. Also follow VIBER PUBLIC CHAT GROUP search chinkee tan, and VISIONCHINKEE on You Tube for more news and encouragements.

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